Fun Factory

Sheila, the Aussie housewife, got out of the shower and slipped on the bathroom floor. Instead of falling over forwards or backwards, she did the splits and suction-cupped herself to the floor. She yelled out for her husband.
- Bruce..! Bruce..!
Bruce came running in.
- Bruce, I've bloody suctioned myself to the floor. She said.
- S'truth. Bruce said, and tried to pull her up.
- You're stuck fast girl. I'll go across the road and get Cobber (his mate) to help.
They came back and they both tried to pull her up.
- No way, we can't do it. Cobber said. So let's try Plan B.
- Plan B..? Exclaimed Bruce. What's that..?
- I'll go home and get my hammer and chisel and we'll break the tiles under her. Replied Cobber.
- Spot on. Bruce said. While you're doing that, I'll stay here and play with her nipples.
- Play with her nipples..? Cobber said. Not exactly a good time for that mate..!
- No. Bruce replied. But I reckon if I can get her wet enough, we can slide her into the kitchen where the tiles are less expensive.