Yesterday I answered a knock on the door, only to be confronted by a well-dressed young man carrying a vacuum cleaner.
- Good morning. Said the young man. If I could take a couple of minutes of your time, I would like to demonstrate the very latest in high-powered vacuum cleaners.
- Go away..! I said. I haven't got any money..! I'm broke..!...... and proceeded to close the door. Quick as a flash, the young man wedged his foot in the door and pushed wide open.
- Don't be too hasty..! He said. Not until you have at least seen my demonstration. And with that, he emptied a bucket of horse manure onto my hallway carpet.
- If this vacuum cleaner does not remove all traces of this horse manure from your carpet, Sir, I will personally eat the remainder. I stepped back and said.
- Well I hope you've got a F*cking good appetite, because they cut off my electricity this morning. What part of broke do you not understand..?!
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